Down Home Cooking with Baby Brother

My favorite new tradition: (that i just started while our kitchen was torn up) KFC night. (sometimes, Baby Brother invents traditions.  That may or may not be followed by other people.  He feels like if he uses the word tradition you can’t say no.  So he’ll do things like say “it’s time for the traditional Thanksgiving fireworks!”) It is supposed to be Mondays, but this week we went thursday instead (I like how Monday got capitalized, but thursday is a loser face with its lower case t), but oh wow is KFC amazing. And the best part of KFC is those amazing biscuits you get. damn jesus does a good job baking those (because there is no other way they can be that amazing, jesus must be back there making them).

But this post, believe it or not, is more of a traditional foodie blawg posty thing, and not as much like my typical “im baby brother, and i went to mcdonalds 37 times this week” I cooked my family a meal, and no one got sick! AND it even had a vegetarian (maybe vegan? watch at the end for proof if you’re a vegan Baby Brother shouldn’t cook for you) part to it.

The wonderful Eating Machine got me the Billy Mays big city clider maker for my birthday, so today boys and girls, we will be making sliders!

STEP ONE: get ingredients. recipe calls for 1 TV to watch Paula Dean on, 1 lb ground beef, 1 teaspoon steak seasoning, 1 remote to flip channels between Paula and Rachel Ray, and a dash of Worcestershire.

Baby Brother and I used to watch Food Network together, and laugh hysterically at it.  Our mom would come to see what was so funny and we’d be going “Rachel Ray is explaining her acronyms again! She said ‘EVOO-thats extra virgin olive oil!” or “Paula Dean just added mayo on top of fried food!”

She didn’t get it.

(see my fancy new granite counters!! aint the spiffy!)

STEP TWO: combine ingredients.

STEP THREE: (step three is only for my paula dean version) ADD SOME BUTTER, THEN DEEP FRY AND TOP WITH BUTTER. Then add a cup of mayonnaise

STEP FOUR: Sing I’m awesome. IM AWESOME, no youre not dude dont lie.

Ringtone Taylor Swift?

and while singing you can scoop the meat into the slider maker.

STEP FIVE: Drink some vitamin water. cooking takes a lot of energy!

STEP SIX: Brush you teeth with a bottle of jack, if you are leaving for the night and not coming back. and while you do that, press the slider maker down and place on the stove on medium heat.

(this was the very FIRST thing cooked on the new stove!)

New stove is pretty!

STEP SEVEN: try to avoid putting in bad ke$ha references that dont flow like in step 6.

STEP EIGHT: They are done once they are cooked… so like not red = done.

serve on slider buns, or just rolls work too i think. and enjoy!

oh and the vegetarian part of the meal i mentioned? the side:

chips! potatoes are vegetables. and the package is green. that means it is natural.

and sour CREAM is vegan, right?

oh, and I GOT A NEW TOY!

Now I can blog from my iPad!

ORRRR talk into it and pretend you’ve got a giant iPhone!  That’s what I would do with one.  That and play Diner Dash.

Baby Brother, is that all you ate for dinner?  ONE slider?

Who else loves sliders?  Baby Brother and I both love miniature food.  Also, giant food.  We’re cool like that.

America Runs on Dunkin’

America runs on dunkin’ [which owns baskin robbins!] BUT, and here is a big shocker for anyone who doesnt follow me on twitter but I’m sure you all already follow me! OR ELSE!, baby brother runs on nike! Crazy, i know. Me, running? but honestly, its good to exercise i would buy anything with an apple logo on it.

This is true.  Pity the day apple makes a literal iPad.

Apple nike+ sensor and iPhone arm band: $60

Nike+ running shoes: $85

Motivational coffee [sorry dunkin, build a store here and maybe i will buy your coffee] $4.98

Not being lazy, start running, and go from not being able to even run a mile to running a mile in 8 min in 1 week: Priceless.

Working a just over min wage job and dropping 150 bucks on something before you know if you like it:  more than you should be spending.

[and running by the river is nice!]

The river really is nice.  And flat, which helps.

The more i invest into running, the longer i have to actually keep it up, right? that’s my theory, but we wont talk about the other money i spent on stuff for running.

Jesus, what else did you buy?

You can even lurk my running here!

Along with running I even ate a salad the other day!

and hiked up a mountain!

[you dont need to tell me how ugly beautiful my town is. i already know.]

Baby brother does actually hike on a regular basis.  Which is weird to me, but he does.

and i introduced my pet chicken to Dave’s Killer Bread. unfortunately the neighbors dogs also thought the bread looked good and ate it before he could finish. at least they chose eating the bread over eating him.

I know i always say this, but maybe i will actually get around to regularly posting blogs. and dont worry, this makes me sound healthy, but i just chose not to mention all the visits to mcdonalds, and all those amazing burger king funnel cake sticks i got [seriously, try them. they are amazing!]

now if only i could find an idea for my next post. any ideas?

There’s a  5K next month in surreal america-tell Baby Brother he needs to enter!

“I don’t want bread with fruit in it…”

I made wheat berries today!

I’ve had them before (Lamb pita cart at the farmers market, I’m looking at you!) But I haven’t cooked them.

Although, I think knowing what they are puts me ahead of the general popualtion… One time I was in the store buying bread and a family standing next to me was staring at a loaf of Wheatberry Bread. The daughter was going “I don’t want bread with fruit in it” while the mom was trying to figure out what fruit was in the bread “I don’t see any fruit at all!”  I (really nicely, because I could totally get being confused) explained that it was the wheat kernels and the name meant it had whole wheat berries.

What did I do with my wheat berries?

Made a bowl of deliciousness!

That had wheatberries, corn, celery, onion, carrot, tomato, beans, and cilantro

Plus pecans on top.  I’m getting a little pecan obsessed.   Pecans are the new nectarines.  (Depressed is the new pink, empanadas are the new cupcakes… <line isn’t until the end of the video, rest isn’t too terribly funny>)

Fred (that’d be Fred Meyer) and I made up today.  We still have our issues but the nice nurse told me today that they have my prescription for less than a third of what I was paying at Walgreens.  I can be bought.  Let’s be honest.

At Fred’s I bought this cause it was ultra cheap with a coupon.  It’s part stevia, part sugar?

And put it on my snack…

A chopped up apple with peanut butter and pecans.

And… those sun crystals are funky.  Once it’s in your mouth it’s not so bad (yes, that is what she said), but the first taste is nast.

We’ll see how it is in coffee tomorrow, but I’m skeptical and sad now.  Lameeeeee.

What’ve you tried and been disappointed by?

“Help yourself to anything in the fridge”

I’ve been babysitting and nannying for a long long time.  And I’ve head “help yourself to anything in the fridge” a million times.  I gotta say, sometimes that’s a better option than others.

The best was a family I nannyed for right before I moved to Portland that always had a ton of fruit and veggies, good lunch meat, and bagels from the local bagel shop.  Always good lunches there!

Where I’m at today… not so much.  On a good day there’s cereal, white bread, and maybe lettuce.  Sometimes a can of tuna.  Their freezer is the fullest I’ve seen today:

Coffee, breastmilk, baby food, vodka, frozen burgers, edamame.  Bread!  That’s a first.  Not a whole lot else.  The fridge is about the same… Milk, a tiny bit of lunch meat, a britta, and more baby food.  When there’s not a lot of food I get worried I’m eating their dinner if I eat anything!

Here’s what they’ve got in the way of canned food.

Yeah.  I bring my lunch.  The most perplexing thing is this bottle of wine.  Which has been sitting, half consumed, for a month.

I almost want to rescue it-we don’t leave wounded soldiers on the field after all!  But, sometimes people are funny about drinking while you watch their kids.  (True story:  the last family I nannyed for before this one would, when I babysat at night, make me a drink before they left and then repeatedly make sure I knew where the beer was.  Sometimes they’d give me booze as gifts.  They were pretty awesome).

I made myself some grilled cheese, and instant coffee with cocoa mix added to make it taste good….

Fantastic discovery I made here earlier this summer because I wanted grilled cheese and they didn’t have butter-you can totally just spray the bread with cooking spray!  Way easier!

I ate while the baby napped.  The doggie had a nap too:

look at those legs in the air!

We went on a walk with the ergo carrier.  I’m a fan… but when it’s warm cuddling the baby like that gets extra warm 😦

And then I ate some leftover soup.  Too much soup.  Still a little warm from the walk.  Didn’t come near finishing.

Baby ate more too!

(peaches with baby oats-let’s be honest, we’ve all eaten this, just in a slightly less pureed form)

Now she’s napping while I am munching on this

(One of those naughty New Zealand apples with cinnamon and almond butter) Proof their house is lacking in some staples-I have to bring my own nut butter!  They literally have NONE!

And the fiance says he’s still tired and his throat hurts, but that his fever is gone!  That’s a good step… (I think he’s just happy that he gets to watch CNN and ESPN all day 🙂 )

Did anyone else ever babysit/nanny for people with empty fridges?  It wouldn’t be so bad if I wasn’t here for eleven hours!

House Hunting

After I got the fiance from work lat night we went to look at houses.  We’ve been kinda looking at houses for a few months, but haven’t found a ton we love.   Then I saw this on the RMLS

It’s adorable, in SW which is what we want, in our price range, with 2 bedrooms and 1300ish square feet.

We might have went two nights ago and stared in the windows.  Don’t worry, it’s not occupied, so it was only a little sketchy.

It’s a short sale though, which is lameeee.

Super cute inside, but kinda weird because it turns out that only one of the bedrooms is really a bedroom?  Who knows.  But it’s cute!  I’d be happy there, but the mortgage is in the fiance’s name, so I’m deferring judgement like a good wifey 🙂

And then we made dinner:  peanut noodles, made with whole wheat spaghetti.

Leftover turkey, steamed green beans, carrots, broccoli, pasta, mixed with peanut butter, a little oil, garlic, peppers, and probably some other seasonings I’m forgetting.  I love this meal because everything except the meat is stuff you have on hand (I always have at least some sort of veggies, peanut butter, and noodles in the house), and I can fill it full of way more vegetables than I’d get ordering peanut noodles somewhere.  It’s super easy (especially if you’ve got leftover meat), and so yummy!  Win win!

Fail alert:  somehow, when getting my toothbrush last night, I managed to do this

Seriously, no clue how I did that.  I picked up my toothbrush, and somehow it flew out of my hand, into the toilet.  Fail.

Good news is, I always have extra toothbrushes (I buy them when they’re on sale!  Which means I have a stash of about a dozen), so I could still brush my teeth.  But seriously, seriously, how did I do that?

Now I’m chomping on this

Because I am not feeling super hungry yet, but I know my tummy needs food.  Oh, and in the spirit of the last post-that bookcase isn’t from IKEA, but the coats you can see to the left are hanging on an IKEA coat rack.